Lead Me Not Into Temptation
by looren gay
Summary: Captain Levi can't get her off his mind and she doesn't seem to notice his struggle, but will he be able to kick his infatuation or will he give up everything for one chance with the elusive Mikasa Ackerman despite his better judgement?( Rated M for later chapters)
1. Chapter 1: Curiosity

**So I wanted to finally do a chapter story of my OTP so tada! This is based on a prompt that was sent to me, hope you like it.**

** Warnings: none for this chapter except mild language.**

** Disclaimer: I do not own snk/aot (sadface)**

**Contains spoilers from ch 55!**

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He often wondered why exactly it had to be that girl, sure she was pretty but there were so many other pretty girls in the scouting legion. He thought maybe it was her strength, maybe he was just excited that another person could carry some of the weight humanity had placed on him when they labeled him the strongest but her strength was almost wasted because she made such reckless decisions concerning that brat.

He even thought maybe he was just lonely. It had been awhile since he kept the company of a woman, but when he tried that method he could only see her face the entire time and afterwards he felt no different.

But he eventually accepted the fact that he harbored feelings for the strange girl but he made sure to conceal it. There was no way he could possibly ever act on those feelings, even if he could be with his subordinate squad member the girl seemed to resent him greatly. She had calmed down around him more and even seemed to trust him after saving her precious brother but she still was cold towards him.

She was never one to show a lot of unnecessary emotion but she acted like he didn't exist unless he was giving her an order. He had a habit of watching her when he was near her. She never looked his way, she only paid attention to her brother and sometimes Armin but he couldn't help but wish she would just glance his way sometimes.

It stopped irritating him a long time ago, he eventually heard about her tragic past and so he then understood her desire to keep everyone out except Eren.

But one thing that annoyed him more than anything now was the fact he found himself doing things all the time to try and get on her good side. He would try to get foods that she liked, he would contain his colorful vocabulary around her, and he would even try and be nicer to the brat.

The girl even made him smoke more than usual, it was a dirty habit that he hated being addicted to but it was already too late for him to stop.

He was outside their hideout smoking and talking to Hanji about the information they just found out from their hostages. It was interesting really, the fact that Historia girl was the real heir to the throne. He knew only Erwin could actually use that information, that asshole was the only person in the world who would try to overthrow a government peacefully.

"Do you think she has what it takes to rule?" Hanji said offhandedly, her usual cheerfulness was diminished most likely due to the fact she had to torture that man, Hanji was many annoying things but she wasn't evil. Levi took a long drag on the last of his cigarette and snuffed it out on the ground.

"Does it matter?" he asked her "Anyone would do at this point"

He looked down at his filthy apron and wanted nothing more than to clean himself, the need to bathe was making him antsy.

"I'm going to go make sure the others are alright" she sighed walking back towards the entrance.

"I'm going to take a bath, this is disgusting" he growled, following her inside. She didn't even so much as giggle at him, which wasn't like Hanji at all. She walked down the stairwell towards the rest of his squad. He turned towards the right and entered a room that held a bathtub, he started the water and then went to fetch himself some clean clothes.

He walked into the room he was staying in and got out the only extra shirt and pants he had with him, all this moving around was becoming annoying and keeping clean was harder than usual.

After finally getting in the tub and washing off all the blood and dirt from today's activities, he sat in the water for a while to think. He recognized this to be a bad idea because as soon as he closed his eyes, Mikasa's face popped into his mind.

He sighed and decided he shouldn't give into his desires at this moment, he had other obligations to do and he thought rubbing one out was not one of them.

He got out of the tub and was glad to dress in clean clothes. Levi folded the dirty clothes and walked out of the bathroom, as he shut the door behind him he ran into someone.

"Dammit" he muttered looking up to see who the hell was right outside the bathroom door. His eyes locked onto big grey ones and he immediately recognized that they belonged to none other than Mikasa Ackerman.

She stared at him as silently as ever, which made him crave a cigarette again. "Well?" he prompted from the girl. His heart started to beat a little faster at the close proximity but he made sure to show no emotion on his face.

She looked at him for a moment before opening her mouth to speak.

"Hanji wants to discuss something with us" she said blankly. He waited as she walked away down the hall. He watched the way her hips swayed as she walked and he had to bite the inside of his cheek before following her to where the rest of the squad was sitting.

He stood beside Hanji and looked at the faces of his squad members, they looked dejected and disappointed. He couldn't blame them really, he never wanted them to get involved in something like torture. They were just kids for god's sake, but this was the harsh reality of the world they lived in. If they wanted to really be free of these walls then they would have to soil their hands sometimes.

"I've sent out the information we received from our guests, so now we just have to wait for the Commander to tell us what to do next" She informed everyone like they didn't already know this.

"Is that it?" Levi asked annoyed.

"Yea you're all free to go to bed now" she announced to the squad and she left without saying anything else. Levi sighed deeply before getting up.

"Are you going to bed Captain?" Eren asked curiously looking at him with wide eyes. Levi shook his head slightly "No but I am going to make some tea, want some?" he asked Eren.

Eren perked up some at his question and nodded his head. "Y-yes sir! I'd like some" he replied with a smile on his face. How easily the brat was cheered up he thought while heading to the small kitchen area to make a pot.

He made himself a cup and sat back down where it was now only Eren, Mikasa, and Armin sitting. He guessed the others went to bed, it was rather late.

"It's ready if you want it" he informed Eren who got up to get a cup.

Armin seemed deep in thought and Mikasa was sitting as quiet as ever.

"Lively crowd" he mumbled while taking a sip. Armin seemed to break out of his thoughts and looked at Levi.

"Sorry, I was just thinking" he clarified shaking his head a little.

Eren walked back in the room with his cup and sat down next to Mikasa.

"Thinkin 'bout what?" Eren asked Armin.

Eren was only a hairs distance away from Mikasa and Levi couldn't help but feel a small pang of jealousy. It was irrational but he had her wrapped around his finger. If he told Mikasa to jump she would probably say 'how high'.

"Remember when you kept messing up during training for the first few days because your holster was broken?" Armin asked Eren looking down at his hands. Eren looked up from his cup, and looked nervously between Armin and Levi.

"Y-yea I do" Eren stuttered a little, with his hand rubbing the back of his neck.

"But once they figured out the problem I was perfect" he stated proudly taking another sip of his tea.

Levi lifted his eyebrow at that statement.

"No Mikasa was perfect but you did pretty well, at least it was much better than me" Armin laughed punching his friend in the shoulder a little. Eren shoved Armin on the shoulder lightly and laughed with him.

Levi had to admit he liked where this conversation was going. He wanted to hear more about Mikasa and her past. So she was little miss perfect since her training days, he didn't know much about what people went through during formal training seeing as he never did it but it wasn't surprising that she was just as good then as she was now.

"Don't down yourself Armin, you did very well" Mikasa chimmed in patting Armins hand. Eren rolled his eyes at her and Levi had to fight the urge to slap him. Mikasa obviously cared about both of them and he didn't like how Eren took that for granted.

"I'm gonna go to bed now guys" Armin sighed. "Alright night" Eren called after him and now it was just Him, Eren, and Mikasa.

"I remember how tough Shardis was on you" Mikasa mumbled. She looked like she wasn't remembering that fondly.

Eren nudged her shoulder with his elbow and Levi narrowed his eyes slightly at the boy.

"You remember that because he gave you everything you wanted on a silver platter" Eren scoffed at Mikasa. She didn't react as you usual but Levi wanted them to keep talking about this.

"Shardis is an ass" Levi declared sipping his nearly cold tea. Eren chuckled a bit and nodded. "Did you have him too?" he asked.

Levi shook his head and pursed his lips "No, but he was commander of the scouting legion before our dear old Erwin and I knew of him when I joined" He stated looking down at his cup.

Eren looked surprised and perked up. Levi glanced at Mikasa and she seemed interested too, which was rare for her. "Ewrin was newly appointed Commander when I joined and Shardis made of habit up showing his ugly mug around a lot"

"He didn't believe in anything we did thus the legion suffered greatly" he explained to the two. He was desperately craving a cigarette but he refused to give up this moment he had with Mikasa, even if she was only here for Eren.

"I can't imagine anyone else as Commander" Eren said shrugging his shoulders. Mikasa nodded in agreement.

"He is the only idiot that could handle this job, that's for sure" Levi pointed out. Eren yawned and stretched his arms out. His hand brushed Mikasa's shoulder and Levi had to scold himself for being so irrationally jealous of Eren's hand.

Eren got up with his cup in hand "Well I guess I should go to bed too" he stated walking toward to kitchen. This left him and Mikasa completely alone and Levi was dying for a smoke.

He was expecting her to get up and leave since Eren wasn't tying her here but surprisingly she didn't budge.

Levi sipped on his cold black tea even though it was now disgusting but he was trying to think of something to say.

"Who did you train with?" She asked suddenly looking down at her hands. He almost choked on his nasty tea. This was the first time she had spoken to him of her own accordance and it wasn't about Eren.

"No one" he replied simply. She looked up at him confused. He knew his answer was vague but he wasn't sure how much of himself he was willing to share. As much as he was excited that she wanted to talk to him giving personal information about himself was dangerous and could result in more attachment than he already had. Her face seemed eager and her eyes were all bright and wide.

"At least no one from the Military" he clarified, he supposed sharing a little was okay.

"How did you learn to use the maneuver gear or get into the scouting legion?" She asked quietly her eyebrows knitted together. He looked at her pretty face and the way her black hair framed it. His right hand clenched into a fist and he knew he couldn't go much longer without smoking.

"I learned on my own and I was _persuaded_ into joining by Erwin himself" he placed emphasis on the word persuaded remembering exactly how Erwin and lackeys forced him into joining. She looked at him shocked and he was pretty sure this was the most emotion he ever saw from her outside of fighting and worrying over Eren.

But he was at his end, he needed a cigarette now and even Mikasa's presence couldn't keep him from it. He was about to get up when she spoke first.

"You can go smoke if you want, I'll come with you" She offered. She uttered those words so normally not knowing the effect she had on him. He felt his heart skip a beat and he was trying to calm himself down.

"You should probably go to sleep" He stated blankly getting up and taking a cigarette out of his jacket pocket. She stood up too and looked at the ground, sweeping a lock of hair behind her ear with a delicate finger. "I don't sleep much really" she mumbled.

His heart sank a little at her words, he knew that feeling all too well.

"Fine come on, just stopped looking like someone kicked you" he grumbled walking towards the stairwell to the exit. She looked up at him and nodded her mood seemingly lifted.

They walked outside in the cool night air and Levi struck the match. He felt relief swim through his veins as he sucked down his first drag. It was hard on him being so close the object of his ridiculous infatuation and maybe now he could talk to her easier.

"So how did you learn on your own how to use the gear?" she asked, interest apparent on her face. She was standing near him her arms crossed in front of her. He knew that he shouldn't give away too much, attachment was dangerous in this world and he was already in deep shit for this girl but he also knew he couldn't stop himself. She was showing him some attention and he was already addicted.

"I was born and raised in the underground city called the Capitol" He answered.

She was watching him intently, her usual passive look replaced with curiosity, it was endearing. "I had to fend for myself so I picked up the gear from the black market and pushed myself to learn it" he said flicking the ash off his cigarette.

She looked disbelieving, shaking her head a little. "Yes, but how? Without the safety of the training equipment learning on your own would be suicide" she concluded with her eyes wide.

He almost chuckled at her expression, it was completely uncharacteristic of her. He wanted to see more.

"It wasn't easy that's for sure but with the right motivation anything's possible, I'm sure you could've done it too" He stated finishing off his cigarette. He tried to maintain his bored expression but talking to this girl was making him feel like a giddy fool. He took a deep breath. He needed to remember she was his subordinate and she was just being curious.

"The fact that you even got gear that worked was amazing enough" she blinked at him. He looked at her and he couldn't believe this was happening.

"Enough about me, what was your motivation to be so good" he asked, not ready to go inside yet. He looked over and watched her close back up again as she looked away from him, her eyes becoming distant. He immediately began to regret his decision to ask her a personal question. He should've just been happy with her asking about his own life.

She looked back up and started walking to the door, "I should go to bed" she muttered and headed inside without even a single look back at him.

He ran a hand through his hair and sighed loudly. He supposed this is what should happen. If he continued thinking about her like they could ever be together, his already crumbling self-control would disappear completely.

But he couldn't help feeling rejected as he headed back to his room to go to bed.


	2. Chapter 2: Craving

**I hope you enjoy this chapter, and please feel free to tell me what you think!**

**Warnings: None really expect cussing **

**Disclaimer: I do not own snk/aot**

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Morning came all too fast and Levi had to reluctantly get out of bed. As soon as he was getting dressed he remembered his conversation with Mikasa last night. He cringed at the memory of how she practically ran away from him. He decided to just drop it completely, and never ask for any more information concerning the past.

He finished making sure his shirt was lent free before he walked out to see if the rest of his squad was getting up to start their morning chores. When he walked around the corner down stairs he saw Jean, Connie, and Sasha working on cleaning the sorry excuse of a kitchen and making some breakfast.

When they saw him round the corner they all saluted and greeted him. They were still so new to being in his squad that they all seemed nervous and scared when they saw him or talked to him. Part of the reason he took to the brat and Mikasa so much was because they never seemed scared of him. Even after he beat Eren bloody, the boy was only ever excited to talk to him or even be near him.

"Where are the others?" he asked wiping the table with a finger to check for dust. It was clean enough for them he supposed and he wiped the little bit of residue off his hands on a handkerchief he pulled out of his pocket,

"Sir, Eren and Armin went with Hanji to do some sort of experiment" Sasha muttered in between mouthfuls of food. "Oh and Historia too I think" she added. He was repulsed by her bad table manners but was even more upset that Hanji was thinking of experimenting when they were supposed to not draw any attention to themselves.

"Outside?" he barked at the squad members, they instantly looked concerned.

"Y-yes sir" Connie stammered looking up from his bowl he had prepared.

Levi instantly headed outside the tiny building to see what that loon was up to with his squad members. He opened the door to leave. As he walked outside he spotted Hanji with Armin, Eren, and Historia next to her out by the field next to their current hideout.

"Oi! Shit for brains" he yelled at the mad scientist as he got closer to them.

She turned her head and smiled at him, waving her hands in the air like an imbecile.

"Just what do you think you're doing? We are trying to lay low, and turning him into a giant slobbering Titan is not what we meant by laying low" He seethed. He couldn't believe she would put them all in danger for her experiments.

"And if you noticed, Levi, he is not a giant slobbering Titan" she smiled at him cheerfully. His lips pressed into a thin line, he was already tired of her shit today.

"Then what the hell are you doing?" he asked the scowl on his face somehow deepening. Eren had both his sleeves rolled up and was looking between Hanji and Levi somewhat nervously.

"Calm down Levi, I'm just taking blood samples from him and decided doing it out here would be safer in case something did happen" She stated cheerfully. He was somewhat happy she seemed back to her old self again but she was aggravating and pushing the limits.

"Just use the blood you've gotten already but no more experimenting on Eren of any kind" he demanded trying to get her to understand.

"Oh I'm done with Eren and now I am about to get Armin's" she responded. Armin looked somewhat worried as he rolled his sleeve up and traded places with Eren"

Levi was confused as to why she was interested in Armin's blood. He wasn't a titan.

"Are you that desperate that you'll settle for experimenting on normal humans" he asked sarcastically. Hanji laughed at him and smiled. "No silly, I'm just taking blood of the people Eren has been around most of his life" She said as she poked the needle into Armin. He winced a little.

"I was hoping to get Mikasa too but she said she was going to stay inside and help the others" she mentioned. He narrowed his eyes, she wasn't inside just a moment ago he remembered.

"Whatever, just don't jeopardize my squad and breakfast is ready, so go eat." he stated forcefully and he then turned away to go look inside to see what Mikasa was up to.

He walked back into the kitchen area to see Jean, Sasha laughing at something and immediately saw Connie making a ridiculous face. He thought it would have been mildly entertaining if he wasn't so suspicious of Mikasa. They saw him and instantly stopped playing around. Levi had to fight the urge to roll his eyes as he wondered if they would ever see him as a person instead of an evil overlord.

He walked past them and up them to go to wear their rooms were located and preceded to walk towards the room that was hers. He might not be able to get the damn brat off of his mind but he was sure not going to let her do whatever she pleased. If she was going to be a part of his squad then she needed to interact with them more. He turned the handle to her door and opened it.

He looked down and saw her in the middle of the small room on the floor, unconscious.

He ran over to wear she lay, ordering loudly for someone to come help and frantically checked for a heartbeat. Her face was extremely pale and her hair was plastered to her face with sweat. He found her small fluttering pulse in her wrist and silently thanked the heavens that she was at least alive. He called her name over and over again, wiping the hair out of her sullen face, she felt hot to the touch. He needed her to wake up. His own heart felt like it fell into his stomach.

He heard footsteps and Jean, Connie, and Sasha all ran into the room looking ready for a fight. They saw Levi with Mikasa laying in his arms and they all rushed over like bumbling idiots.

"What's wrong?!" Jean yelled way too loud and Levi was getting irritated quickly.

"She's not responding, go get be a wet towel" he barked at the group. Jean got up quickly and ran out of the room to fetch it.

"Is she breathing?" Sasha asked with wide eyes. She lowered her head to Mikasa's chest.

"Yes, she's alive. Help me get her on the bed" he orderd. He and Sasha lifted the unconscious girl onto her bed and Levi began to shake her lightly. Connie just stood in the room trying to process what was going on.

"Wake up, Mikasa! Can you hear me?" He pleaded with her. She didn't respond again. Jean came back carrying wet towels and a water basin. The rest of the group followed behind them, all worried.

"What's happening?!" Eren demanded as he rushed over to her bedside next to Levi. His eyes were wide as he touched her face.

"She must've passed out, check her head for any bumps" Levi instructed and Eren's hands started to feel around her head. Levi watched as he saw the boy interact with Mikasa, he was relatively calm, his fingers gentle against her head and his eyes were filled with concern and another unnamed emotion Levi couldn't quite place.

He looked down at his own hands, they were shaking. He could not recall a single moment when he was so scared that his hands had a tremor, in all his countless battles with the titans, even the one against the female titan that took away his former squad members, he could not recall single moment where fear made him lose control of himself.

But now, this girl, this one single girl who was laying before him only unconscious was making him crack more than watching countless of his comrades fall one battle after the next.

Levi stood up abruptly.

"Place the towel on her head" he instructed to no one in particular. He turned around to leave and he saw Hanji standing near the door, watching only him. He looked away and walked past her out of the room.

He walked fast, he needed to get somewhere else now. He walked into the room he was staying in and shut the door behind him. His back was against the door and he closed his eyes.

He allowed himself to remember every painful memory he had, he had so many that it made the air leave his lungs. He stopped crying long ago, but the ache never left. He remembered Isabell and Farland, all the young kids that joined the Scouting Legion only to watch them be killed on their first mission, and his squad. He remembered the squad that he thought would make it, they had been through so much and fought so hard but were all wiped out in a matter of minutes.

He allowed himself to remember these things to remind him that they hurt because of his attachments. He had to remain distant. He decided that he was no longer to think of Mikasa and that he needed to distance himself. It was already a one sided relationship so it would be a fruitless pursuit anyway.

Levi took a deep breath and opened his eyes, this was getting him nowhere and he was acting like a damn child. She was probably just not eating so that there would be more food for Eren or some ridiculous thing like that. He straightened his jacket and someone knocked on the door.

He opened it and Hanji was standing there. "She woke up" she said while looking him up and down. He remembered how Hanji looked at him when he practically ran out of the room. Fuck he thought, if someone were to find out how he felt it could cause a lot of issues for him and his whole squad.

"Good, has she said what happened?" he asked with his composure back intact. Hanji arched an eyebrow.

"No, but she's asking for you" she replied. His face remained passive but he felt his heart jolt inside of his chest at her words.

He said nothing as he walked past her and towards the room where Mikasa was. He opened the door and only Eren and Armin were in the room with her.

She was sitting up in her bed and Armin was holding her hand while Eren was rubbing her back. Her face was back to a better color but she was much paler than usual.

"I need to talk to the Captain, alone" She told Eren and Armin as soon as she saw him enter the room. Armin got up to leave but Eren lingered over her as if he didn't want to get up. "It's okay Eren, It's only for a minute" she assured him. He sighed and got up to leave with Armin but he still looked anxious.

They closed the door behind them and now Levi was completely alone with Mikasa.

She stared at her clasped hands in front of her as he walked closer to her bed. He felt uneasy about the way her eyes looked so empty and distant again.

"Well?" he prompted form the girl. She finally looks up at him and opens her mouth to speak but closes it again. He's starting to feel aggravated and he wants her to just say whatever it is she has to say.

"Spit it out" he demanded and she closed her eyes.

"Are you mad at me?" she asked him suddenly. He blinked at her unable to say anything. She was the one who was unconscious on the floor yet she looks worried about him.

"Why would I be mad at you passing out?" he asked dumbly. She looked back down at her hands and he felt his heart constrict.

"No, I meant about last night" she said quietly. She lookd him in the eyes and he swears she has the thickest eyelashes of anyone he's ever met.

"Why would I be upset?" Better question, why did I find you unconscious on the floor? He asked seriously. He didn't want to talk about feelings with her right now, he was trying to abstain from her completely and already failing.

She bit down on her plump bottom lip and he had to look at the side of her head. He wondered why on earth she was now all of a sudden concern with how he felt after being around him all these months.

"I was about to come help with breakfast when I got really dizzy and blacked out" she said taking a shaky breath. She still looked pale except her cheeks were flushed with an enticing shade of pink.

"You did feel warm earlier" he muttered feeling her forehead again, her eyes went wide when he touched her and she looked away again. She felt warm still, it seemed like she had a fever. His hand lingered on her forehead a little before he retracted it. "You need to rest and you need to eat" he ordered plainly. She played with her hands nervously.

He moved to leave the room and get her a bowl of the porridge they made but she reached out and grabbed his hand. He felt his skin tingle where she touched it and he looked down at her. She was looking at him pleadingly. Her face was red and her eyes were hazy, she looked so tired.

"I'm sorry about yesterday" she whispered. He looked at her closely and she seemed off, maybe the fever was making her delusional. He pried her hand off of his wrist. Touching her was not good for his self-control.

"Really, it's no big deal. I'll go make you some food just stay in bed" he told her as he left the room.

He was glad she was alright but he knew that fevers were not to be taken lightly and she needed to rest before it got any worse.

When he shut the door behind him Eren was waiting outside of it, he looked stressed.

"Calm down, she's okay just a fever but I am going to ask that you keep visits at a minimum and don't get to close. The last thing I need is a bunch of sick brats to deal with" he urged. Eren looked displeased by Levi's words but nodded his head and walked with him to the kitchen.

Everyone was sitting around the table, except Hanji.

"Wheres four eyes?" he asked them as he poured some of the porridge into a bowl for Mikasa.

"She's feeding the prisoners" Armin answered quietly, his head as laying in his arms. Levi was not happy with the morale of his troops, but he couldn't blame them. They were in a fight with not only titans but also humans too and now to top it all off their best solider was sick.

"Mikasa most likely has a fever, as long as she stays in bed she should get better soon. As I told Eren, as long as you don't get too close and catch her illness you can visit her" he informed the rest of the group as he turned to go give Mikasa her food.

She was laying down with a wet towel on her forehead as he walked in to her room. She saw him and sat up abruptly to take the food. He was still unhappy with her color but she was at least able to eat. He watched her eat for a moment and sat down on her bed next to her, unlike Sasha she was a delicate eater and made sure to chew with her mouth closed but she did eat rather fast he guessed he must've been hungry.

She set the bowl on the side table near the small bed she was sitting in and looked at him again. It was quiet for a moment and Levi debated on whether he should've left or not.

"My parents were killed right in front of me" She stated looking down at her hands. He sharply inhaled, he definitely did not expect her to come out and say that.

"I was taken by slave traders, they were going to sell me in the black market on the count of my heritage" she was slurring her words a little and was pointing to her face. He looked at her beautiful face, her eyes were cloudy at the moment from the fever but they were enchanting as ever.

"Eren saved me from them he killed two of those men, and gave me the courage to fight the last one" she was mumbling now and her eyes were drooping a little, he hated to admit it but she looked so cute.

He knew her parents were murdered in front of her and taken in by Eren's family but he did not know it was Eren himself that saved her. It made sense that she wanted to protect him so badly now, he basically gave her a second chance at life.

She was looking at him intently, her face was only a little away from him. Her eyes were half lidded, and she appeared to be looking at his mouth. He felt his heart beat pick up. He could feel the hair on his arms stand up as she leaned closer to him. He felt he was dreaming and all thought left his mind as his nose brushed hers, her mouth was open a little and he couldn't think of anything he wanted more than to feel those soft lips against his.

His eyes closed as he leaned forward, her breath softly caressed his face as he got closer.

His lips brushed hers lightly before he heard a soft knock at the door that was open. He straightened up and cleared his throat as Hanji stared at him.

As she stared at him he realized the full implications at what almost happened, she had almost kissed him. He tried to squash the rising happiness he felt but he couldn't and it only made him angrier that he gave into his feelings.

"You should rest" he instructed Mikasa while getting up to leave her room. Hanji stared at him as he left and proceeded to follow him to his room.

"Levi, we need to talk" she said he she closed the door behind him. He sighed as he sat down in the chair next to the bed.

"About what might I ask?" he spat. He stared at her as his mouth hardened into a thin line.

"I think you know" she stated looking at him pointedly.

He simply clenched his jaw and stared at her. She sighed and sat down on the bed.

"I'm not here to yell at you, you're the last person I could ever tell to stop feeling" she said as she fixed her glasses.

"Levi I know you've been through so much, I see you as a friend and I want you to be happy" She explained. He soften his hard look toward her. "I won't say anything to commander about you two as long as you can promise this won't affect your squad" she spoke.

"There is nothing to promise, It might be true that I harbor some irritating feelings for the girl but the chances of her desiring me are slim to none" he retorted.

She cocked her head to the side. "Really? She seemed to desire you as she was about to kiss you" she snorted.

He felt the rising happiness coming back as she said that but he knew it was probably a fluke. "She was delusional from the fever, probably thought I was Eren" He stated rolling his eyes. "She's never even looked my way before" he finished.

Hanji laughed a little while getting up and walking towards the door. "You can't see her looking at you because usually she does it when you're busy" she informed him patting his shoulder.

"When you're ready we need to go water the hostages. Oh and I'm surprised at you really, letting that girl almost kiss you when she was sick. That's not like you at all Levi" she stated as she left.

He paced around the room a little trying to process this information, so she might have feelings for him he marveled. He felt elated and for the first time in a while he wanted to smile but his happiness was soon deflated as he realized that now he had to make a choice. He could lie to Mikasa and tell her he didn't want her or he could potentially fall in love with her. One option could end with him having to watch her fall in love with another man while he remained alone but the other could result in him being that man and breaking beyond repair if something were to happen to her. He had no idea which one felt worse. He just knew that if she were to try to kiss him again we would not be able to resist her.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He couldn't think straight right now and so he decided to go help Hanji instead, maybe she could help him with this. She was right though he guessed, it was disgusting that he almost kissed her while she was so ill. He was losing himself to this girl already and he didn't know if would be able to stop.

But first thing was first he was going to have a smoke because he only now realized that he was craving one.


	3. Chapter 3: Sacrifice

**A little fun fact for you I was torn over making Levi a smoker or not because half of me was all no way Levi would find that gross but**

**the other half was all but he_ looks_ like a smoker, so yea look which one won :P**

**welp thanks for the reviews, you guys are so sweet and as always I hope you enjoy this chapter! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own snk/aot**

* * *

Over the next couple days, Levi made it his personal duty to stay the hell away from the sickly Mikasa. Every time he came near her he would get nervous, his hands would start to sweat and he would feel an intense craving for a cigarette more than ever.

And it didn't help at all that she was acting so different the entire time not like her usual distant self at all. She would give him her undivided attention the entire time he was around her, she would actually converse with him and tell him things about her life, and he was becoming addicted fast especially after their almost kiss.

He just knew that once she was back to her healthy state she would go right back to acting like he didn't exist and never talking to him and she probably didn't even remember what happened between them.

Today was the second day that he had managed to stay away from her, but he was currently on his last cigarette which has been the only thing keeping him away from her. Hanji told him earlier that her fever had finally broke, which was good because Erwin's orders could come at any time to tell them what they should do next and she needed to be ready to move out.

He finished the last drag of his last cigarette and put it out with his boot. He hoped today was the day they would hear something from Erwin, he was tired of sitting idle and when he was in one place for too long with nothing to do he had a bad habit of cleaning everything even if it wasn't even dirty.

Levi walked into the front door and headed to the room Hanji was staying in. He knocked on her door but heard no answer. He sighed and opened the door slowly.

"Oi, four eyes! You in here?" he yelled loudly to make sure he wasn't walking in on anything gross, but as he looked inside the room he found it to be empty.

He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, she was probably with Mikasa. It wasn't that he didn't want to see Mikasa, that was the complete opposite but he couldn't think clearly around her. All logical thought flew out of his head when he saw her and he became worse than some bumbling teenage brat.

He closed her door and walked towards the room down the hallway that was Mikasa's. He lifted his hand to knock but he heard Hanji's annoying laughter and decided to just go inside.

He swung the door open and saw Hanji sitting by Mikasa with her hand on her forehead.

"Oh hello Levi! I was just telling Mikasa that she's good to go and is officially off bed rest" she smiled at him. He wanted to roll his eyes at how goddamned cheerful she sounded but he looked over to Mikasa and saw her looking away with a tint of pink on her cheeks. He swore she looked almost embarrassed.

"Good, I need her to clean this filthy room and take a bath." he stated, he looked around the room, it wasn't the worst he's ever seen but the windows were dusty, the floor needed sweeping, and he knows her blankets needed washing as she's been laying in them for the last couple of days without bathing.

"Only you could find this room filthy" Hanji chuckled as she looked around the room with him. He snorted at her comment and stole a quick glance over to Mikasa who was still staring down at her bed before leaving. He wanted to stay in there with her, help her clean so he could make sure she was alright but he knew if he spent more time with her than necessary he would give into every desire he had before thinking through things clearly.

He closed the door behind him as he left. He only walked a little ways down the hallway before he heard a door open and heavy footsteps catching up with him.

He turned his head a little and Hanji jogged up beside him.

"Wait up Levi! I wanted to talk" she sang, he squinted his eyes at her suspiciously.

"What?" he hissed. He knew this woman all too well and when she was too happy about something it usually meant something annoying was going to come out of her mouth.

"Don't sound so mean, I haven't even said anything yet!" she whined. He rolled his eyes at her. "Just spit it out" he demanded, he needed to go mop some floors and she was aggravating him already.

"I talked to Mikasa for you!" she chirped with a huge smile on her face. Levi's heart stopped and his stomach dropped.

"You what!?" he snapped at her, whirling around to face her. He knew Hanji finding out was going prove to be terrible. The damn lunatic couldn't keep her mouth shut. She threw her hands in the air "calm down! I didn't say anything about how you feel, I only asked her about how she felt" Hanji explained.

He relaxed a little but still didn't approve of Hanji meddling with his affairs. "What do you mean?" he asked wanting to know how much damage she had done already.

"I told her that she was awfully close to you the other day and asked if she had a crush on a certain Captain" she stated matter of factly. He narrowed his eyes at her words. "She blushed rather cutely and mumbled some excuse but we all know what that means" she finished nudging him in the side.

He remembered seeing her blush just a minute ago. It was amazing how someone who was so strong and saw so much pain could still have such an innocence about them. He was amazed by this girl on a regular basis it seemed.

Levi sighed and started walking away. "Wait! Isn't this what you wanted to hear?" she asked arching one eyebrow. He stopped again to face her.

"Hanji I appreciate the thought but this is personal matter and plus it would be an inappropriate relationship so pursing it would end in disaster" he informed her. He tried to sound as serious as he could in hopes he could convince himself of that too.

She sighed this time looking dejected, he was confused because this woman was telling him to be careful just a few days ago.

"I've been thinking about it for the last few days and we live such fragile lives, I mean think about it Levi we could die at any time so if you find something that makes our short lives at least a little bit better then why not hold onto that?" She asked him, her eyes were wide and he had never seen Hanji so serious before.

"I have seen more than enough people I care about die, why would I want to add another one?" He asked of her. He knew she was trying to help in her own annoying way but this was too risky and he was done with this conversation. It made him want a cigarette but he had none left.

"Do you really believe that if she were to die today you would be alright?" Hanji whispered. Her words hit him hard, and he recalled how his hands shook at the mere sight of Mikasa's unconscious body. It never occurred to him that it might have been too late to stop this. He tried to imagine her dying but he couldn't he couldn't fathom a world without her and this scared him. If he couldn't even imagine it how could he expect to live through it. He was trying remember the turning point when this infatuation turned into something more but he was drawing a blank.

"Levi? Are you okay?" she asked him waving her hand in front of his face. He blinked trying to recompose himself.

"I'm fine. I'm going to go mop, excuse me" he huffed finally walking away from her. As soon as she was out of sight he headed straight outside, he felt uncomfortably hot and his head was swimming.

Once he pushed the door open and stepped outside into the cool evening air he took a deep breath. He was concerned with what to do now he's tried so hard to distance himself from everyone, he hardened himself for so many years yet somehow this girl has managed to break through it and she wasn't even trying. He had to remember who he was, he was a symbol. Many people relied on him to be strong when no one else could, he had broken many ties and detached himself from many people before for the sake of humanity so he wondered why ridding himself of these feelings for this girl was so hard.

A rustle broke through his tortured thoughts and his head snapped up ready for whatever was coming.

Eren came through the bushes near the door carrying a basket with something he couldn't see in it.

He stared at him with a confused look on his face. He realized how weird he must've looked just standing there ready to fight.

"Captain, are you ok?" he asked with his head tilted slightly. He pulled his fingers through his hair and took a shaky breath.

"I'm fine Eren, you snuck up on me is all" he reassured the young boy.

"What are you doing, sir?" Eren asked as he fidgeted with the basket in his hands.

"Taking a shit Eren, what does it look like?" Levi replied in a snarky manner.

He looked back down at the basket. "What's in there?" Levi asked him feeling a little guilty for snapping.

Eren looked down at the basket too and pulled out a little plump red fruit.

"I found ripe strawberries!" he exclaimed in excitement. "I haven't had any since I was a kid, I remember going to pick some with Mikasa and Armin for my mom" he said, with a sad smile on his face. Levi never recalled having any of those before, he never ate much fruit living in the underground but he perked up when he heard that Mikasa liked them.

"Mikasa likes them?" he blurted out, he instantly felt stupid for saying that. He was trying to convince himself to forget about her somehow and Eren's stupid talk of fruit ruined that.

Eren looked at him a little surprised but nodded with a stupid grin plastered on his face.

"I know she's been sick and hates just laying around so I thought these would be perfect" he beamed. Levi was always a little shocked to see how kind hearted Eren really was. He remembers how his old squad all loved Eren, they took him under their wings and really trusted him.

"Here" Eren said handing him a few of the biggest ones "wash these and give them to her" he instructed. Levi was very confused by the gesture.

"You're the one who picked them" Levi responded leaning back against the side of the house.

"Yea but she would like it if you gave them to her" he said sheepishly, rubbing his neck. Levi took the fruits from the boy and arched an eyebrow.

Eren only smiled at him and walked in the door to go inside with the rest of the fruit.

Levi looked down at his hands and sighed, he couldn't resist being able to give her something she liked even if he knew he shouldn't do it.

He walked inside after Eren and headed to the little kitchen to clean the food before he went to give it to her.

Hanji, Connie, and Sasha were in the Kitchen when Levi walked in after Eren.

"What's that?" Sasha asked Eren, a greedy look in her eyes, somehow the girl could tell from this distance it was food.

"You can have some in a little while, just not right now okay?" Eren warned the girl.

"Jeeze, I'm not gonna eat it just because it's food" she huffed. Eren rolled his eyes and Hanji chuckled at the two. Levi went to the little sink and ran some water over the strawberries in his hand, he had to make sure they were free of any pests and dirt.

"How come Captain Levi can have some but I can't" Sasha whined to Eren when she looked at what he was doing. Eren sighed "He's going to take them to Mikasa because she's been sick so just calm down" Eren almost yelled.

Levi was getting a headache just listening to these brats so he hightailed it to Mikasa's room after putting the berries in a bowl before they could get on his nerves anymore.

He had to admit he was a little nervous, he was used to secretly getting food he noticed she liked but that was different than directly bringing something for her alone.

He took a deep breath before knocking on her door.

"Come in" he heard her answer through the door.

He opened the door and saw her wiping the windows with a cloth. Her hair was damp, he guessed she must've bathed like he told her to.

"I brought you something" he muttered. She furrowed her eyebrows a little in confusion and Levi wanted to run his fingers over the little crease above her nose.

She sat down the cloth and walked over to him. He held out the little bowl to her.

"What's this" she asked quietly. She took the bowl from his hands and grabbed one of the strawberries. She held it up and her eyes went wider as she looked over it.

"Where did you get these?" she gasped as she looked back at him.

He looked at the way her eyes lit up over the little bit of fruit. Her eyes were always enticing to him but they sparkled at this moment and he was suddenly thankful that Eren let him give her this.

"Eren found them" he answered honestly. She smiled at him as she took a bite out of it. He felt his heartbeat speed up as she smiled at him. He had never seen her smile like that before. She rarely smiled and when she did it was never this big. It brightened up her face, he thought she was beautiful even when she didn't smile but now she was absolutely radiant.

He felt his breathing become uneven, and he felt silly getting worked up over watching this girl eat some damn fruit but as she took another bite out of the one in her hand some of the red juice dripped from the corner of her mouth. The dark liquid ran down her pink lips and onto her pale skin invitingly.

Before he even registered what he was about to do his hand lifted on its own accord and he wiped the corner of her mouth with his thumb gently and without thinking he licked it off his own thumb.

He instantly felt shock run through his veins as he realized what he just actually did. She was staring at him intently and a blush had appeared on her cheeks. He felt his own face heat up.

"Enjoy your fruit and thank Eren later" he said gruffly as he turned around. He was mentally cursing himself as he realized he was still out of cigarettes and the craving he had grew immensely.

"W-wait" she called after him softly. He turned back around to face her and she was blushing deeply while holding out a strawberry to him.

"Do you want one?" she asked timidly as she looked down at his feet unable to look him in the eyes. He knew he shouldn't take one, he should get away from her before he did something stupid again and besides he wanted her to have them.

But he wanted to try one since she made them look so appetizing.

He reached his hand out to take it from her but she pulled it back a little out of his reach shaking her head. Levi looked at her curiously and she held it out to him again but ignored his hand completely.

His stomach dropped as he realized what she wanted him to do.

She stood there with the fruit held close to his face, she looked embarrassed but also there was a glint of determination in her eyes. He loved the way the dark pink of the blush played against her fair skin tone. He felt himself harden at the thought of leaving marks all over that pretty pale skin of hers.

He smirked internally at the opportunity to tease the girl.

He grabbed her wrist with his hand to steady hers and leaned over a little to bite down on the fruit in her fingers. He made sure to look her in the eyes as he slowly bit into the fruit, his teeth lightly grazed the tips of her fingers as he did so. He saw her plump bottom lip fall open a little as she watched him. He wanted to feel those lips against his, he wondered if they would be as soft as they looked.

He stood back up and wiped his own mouth a little noticing her blush darken to the same red as the fruit in her hands. The taste of it was sweet and he decided he liked them as they would now always remind him of Mikasa.

He looked at her and thought of how innocent she seemed, blushing over just feeding him something. He then wondered if she had ever even been with a man, she probably hasn't. He felt despair run through his veins, she was still so young. She was still so inherently good, even after all the terrible things this world put her through and here he was wanting her without even thinking about if he was good enough for her. Compared to her he was a monster, he was disgusting, and he didn't deserve her. He killed people just because Erwin told him to and she had only killed to save her brother. He had been so selfish thinking of only what he wanted, not about what she needed.

He took a small breath and stepped back, letting go of her hand. She looked at him confused and lowered her own hand. She was about to speak but he cut her off.

"That was inappropriate and it will not happen again" he stated roughly before turning on his heel and walking out of the room quickly.

He needed her to hate him, she needed to continue hating him. He would not allow himself to soil her too, she was the one thing he had a chance to not fuck up completely. He knew that the only way he could stay away from her now was if it was the best thing for her.

He was walking quickly and not paying attention when Hanji ran up in front of him.

"Levi!" she yelled seriously. He was already so stressed from his encounter with Mikasa and having no cigarettes left that he felt like he was going to explode.

"The fuck do you want four eyes!?" he spat, he knew it was unreasonable to get mad at her but he couldn't care at this moment.

She stopped in her tracks and stared at him while holding up an envelope.

"Erwin sent us orders."


	4. Chapter 4: Indulgence

**A/N:** **Sorry this took awhile to update! dont fret I'm not abandoning this story just school getting a little crazy is all but fair warning here on out **

**this story is gonna get more and more R rated hehe so yea hope you guys appreciate that, also thanks to all the people that reviewed your comments are **

**so sweet! I love ya!**

**Hope you enjoy this chapter**

**Disclaimer: I do not own snk/aot**

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Levi paced around the room, it was late at night and he couldn't sleep knowing what was going to happen in the next two days. They wouldn't have much time to prepare and he knew exactly what, or who he should say, they we're dealing with.

He knew the Reebs Company should arrive the day after next, this gave him basically no time to prepare at all and it didn't help that he had no cigarettes. He felt himself slipping in more ways than one.

He looked around his room, it was a complete mess. There was dust all over the ceiling, he could clearly see spots he missed when he last cleaned the windows, and the wrinkles in the sheets on his bed was driving him insane. He needed to clean it all before he could focus on this plan but he had no time left.

He had to regain his composure before he left his room, he and Hanji decided on keeping his squad in the dark until Reebs arrived and it would be difficult to do so if they saw him acting so out of character.

He heard a small knock at his door and rolled his eyes thinking it was probably Hanji coming to bother him some more about all this.

"What?" he demanded at the closed door.

It opened without his permission and he was about to get angry with Hanji until he saw the visitor was not Hanji but in fact Mikasa.

She walked into his room, it was late and he was about to scold her for being up still but he remembered she said something once about not being able to sleep well. She was standing there in front of him a little awkwardly and he felt irritation rise up within him.

"Well?" he prompted from the quiet girl, she looked up at him and he noticed she was holding something. She held out one of her hands and in it was a small rectangular wooden box. He quirked his head at her but took the box from her anyways.

"What's this?" he asked while opening the box, his eyes widened just a fraction as he saw what was inside.

"I know you always go through all of your cigarettes before you're able to buy more and since you brought me those strawberries I wanted to return the favor" she mumbled weakly before turning to walk away.

"Wait" he called out. She stopped at the doorway and looked over her shoulder, her eyes distant and cold even though she had just given him a gift.

"Why are you giving me this?" he asked wearily, he needed her to hate him, not give him gifts that he desperately wanted.

She looked at him for a moment before she simply shrugged and left without another word.

He felt an intense need to chase after her and get her to come back to his room so he could kiss her until he could forget what he had to do in the next two days but that would solve nothing. Instead he took out a cigarette and headed for the nearest exit outside of the house.

Once outside he greedily sucked down the smoke and he soon felt the nerve calming effects of it. He felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of his chest and he could think clearly again.

He finished his cigarette a little too quickly for his liking but he couldn't stop himself and he soon stubbed out the small bit that was left.

He was on his way back to his room to finally get some semblance of sleep until he walked by Mikasa's room, her door had a small light coming from under it.

He stopped and rolled his eyes, when did this girl ever learn. Only a few days ago she was unconscious on the floor from a fever, she still needed to rest since her body was only just recovering.

He didn't bother knocking as he threw open her door.

"Oi! What are you doing still awake, you need t-…" He stopped his scolding short when he saw her, she was in fact asleep. Her lamp was just still flickering beside her bed.

She was on top of the covers curled into a tight ball with her arm underneath her head. He looked at her hair that was sprawled out around her sweet sleeping face. Her lips slightly parted from her slow even breaths.

He stared at her for a moment, unable to pry his eyes away from her sleeping form. He wanted to keep her there like that forever, safe and at peace. He felt like a perverted stalker but he couldn't stop himself from going over to her and brushing the small locks out of her face. His fingers itched to touch the silky black stands of her hair.

As he slid his fingers through her hair and out of her face he watched her eyes move behind her eyelids. Her hair was soft and he trailed his fingers down the side of her face, unable to stop himself no matter how wrong he knew this was.

He thought that since she was asleep he could have this moment with her without causing any damage but as his fingers came in contact with her neck, her eyes flew open and she immediately lunged at him.

He had only a little time to catch her right hook to his face but he grabbed her fist as she jumped on top of him.

"Captain?!" she choked as she finally looked at who she was attacking.

Levi was now underneath her and her skirt was hiked up around her thighs, he felt the air around them get hotter but he was determined to keep his composure.

"W-what are you doing?" she demanded. This was the first he had ever seen her so flustered before, her cheeks were turning a dark shade of red and her hair was sticking up wildly around her face. He was still holding onto her fist as she eyed him.

"I was trying to pull the blanket over you so you wouldn't get cold" he lied with a straight face, no way in hell was he going to admit that he was watching her sleep.

"Oh…" she breathed dumbly. He let go of her hand but she stayed on top of him and he was becoming more and more aware other exposed thighs, it was getting harder to control his devious thoughts as his eyes slowly wandered down her body. Her legs were strong from all the years of training but they still held a feminine shape to them.

He tried to think of something else titans, dead comrades, and the promise he made to himself just the other day but he couldn't keep his desire at bay and he felt his dick harden. She must've felt it as she was sitting directly on top of it but she didn't move, she only stared at him with the same dumb look on her face.

His body wouldn't let him move but his thoughts were in a terrible war, one side wanted to grab her and have her on this bed but the other side was reiterating the argument that he had earlier about not being good enough for her.

He closed his eyes and mentally wielded himself to get up but all thoughts were halted as he felt her fingers on his cheek.

He kept his eyes closed as he felt the pads of her fingers trail down his face and over to the corner of his mouth. Everywhere her fingers touched left a burning trail, with each movement he felt his self-control dwindling.

She slowly ran her middle finger across his bottom lip, which he then parted involuntarily. He had no intention of stopping her then, if she was going to do something then he'd let her. He was insane if he thought he could control himself when it came to her, he was a terrible person but he was still only just a person. There was limits to his self-control and he had reached that limit.

His hand twitched wanting to touch her so badly but he was also afraid his touch would break the spell that kept her on top of him. He made sure to keep his eyes closed, it made it easier for him to let her do this.

She slid her fingers down his neck now, it made his breathing uneven and he felt warmth flood into his hips as she started to unbutton his shirt. She un-did the buttons torturously slow, one by one. His dick twitched at each button that she popped open.

He was beginning to think that she wasn't as inexperienced as he thought before since she was teasing him so precisely, it's like she knew exactly what to do to make him melt underneath her.

She finally opened his shirt and pushed it down his shoulders but he didn't move to take it off so it hung around his arms awkwardly. She raked her blunt nails up his arm and rested both hands on his shoulders. His belly clenched at the sensation and he felt all coherent thought leave his mind, the only thing left was the excitement at what she would do to him next.

He felt her lips on his neck and his eyes shot open, her lips were warm and he tilted his head back so she had better access. He shivered as she planted feather light kisses all along his neck and down onto his chest. He wanted to see her face, it should show how she was feeling.

He grabbed and handful of glossy black hair and gently tilted her head back so he could see her face clearly.

Her cheeks were flushed, lips parted, and her eyes were glazed over with the same desire he knew was mirrored in his. He felt a surge of need wash over him and his mouth came crashing over hers.

He kissed her hard, their teeth clacking against each other a little but he didn't care all he was only focused on the way her plump lips molded against his own. The relief that he felt wash through his veins was better than any cigarette could ever hope to give him.

He heard her make a small noise against his mouth that sounded like mix between a whine and a moan but he knew the feeling it gave off, desperation. He silently wondered if she had desired him like he did her all this time.

He felt the bed against his back and his hands flew to grab her waist, her shirt had risen form the activities so he felt her bare skin under his hands. He pulled her closer to him although she was already flush against him but it still didn't feel close enough.

He continued to kiss her, letting his tongue slip into her mouth occasionally. He could feel her chest heaving against his. Her elbows on either side of his head, supporting her weight.

His hands had now wondered up her shirt and he traced the lines of the muscles in her back, she was nicely defined and he eagerly awaited when he would get to see her undressed.

He broke the kiss and was about to help her take off her shirt before there was a knock on the open door to her room.

Shit, he had to stop leaving the fucking door open he thought as he felt Mikasa get off him to fix her clothes. Levi sat up slowly and hoped his glare was enough to scare off the asshole who was intruding.

He looked over and saw Hanji with wide eyes and a smug smile plastered on her face.

"Hope I'm not interrupting but you should really learn to close your door" she said cheerfully echoing his thoughts from earlier.

He sighed and pulled his shirt back over his shoulders, he watched as Mikasa looked between him and Hanji nervously.

He sighed and looked at Hanji expectantly.

"What do you want?" he spat, he knew being angry at her was probably unreasonably but he couldn't help it. It was the most frustrating thing he had ever experienced.

"I need to talk to you" she stated, his glares never worked on her and it irked him greatly.

"Fine" he hissed getting up off the bed. He turned to Mikasa before he left.

"I'll be back, we need to talk" he said a little more calmly, but Mikasa looked shy now and her face was still flushed a deep shade of red.

"Are you sure talking is all you're going to do" Hanji joked jabbing Levi in the side with her elbow.

Levi never wanted to punch a girl more in his entire life.


	5. Chapter 5: Trust

I'm so sorry I let a whole month pass by :/ im sorry guys~

I do have some good news and that is im now out of school and will hopefully be udating every week (fingers crossed)

but here is chapter five! thanks for the reviews and fav/follows you guys are the sweetest!

hope you enjoy!

**Disclaimer:I do not own snk/aot**

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The two walked into Hanji's room and he shut the door behind him this time to try and get into the habit. His fellow squad leader turned to him and sighed.

"I know we agreed not to tell them but maybe you should inform Mikasa" she stated plainly.

He inhaled sharply and pinched the bridge of his nose, he knew she didn't like using Eren as bait but if she were to know the kind of man they were up against then she would be unable to let Eren go.

"You don't have to tell her all the dirty details but she is the strongest other than you and she could be helpful." She explained further.

Levi thought a moment on what he was going to say to her, he knew she was logically right but she didn't know Mikasa as well as he did. He wasn't an expert on her personality but he had seen her do more reckless things in Eren's defense and he knew telling her would only put her life in danger.

"I understand where you're coming from but Mikasa will lose all rationality when it comes to Eren." He sighed.

Hanji looked at him seriously, which was odd for her.

"Levi, you always complain about Mikasa being unable to trust you but right now I see you placing zero trust in her." She narrowed her eyes at him and he felt some truth in her words.

When it came to Eren, he didn't trust her at all. She had proven over and over again to be harmful to herself and the mission at hand whenever she even thought Eren was in any danger.

"I can't afford any mistakes in this, you know that" he huffed, this was getting agitated at Hanji's persistence in the matter, this was not negotiable. He started to walk out but he felt her hand on his shoulder.

He looked back and saw her face was contorted in pain, her eyes welling up with tears.

"This is something you can't afford to do alone" she whispered. He was in utter shock as he saw Hanji in such an emotional state. This was something he had not seen in her for some time and it was rarely done on a whim.

"I'll be fine Hanji." he shrugged her off and walked out the door but he couldn't shake the feeling she was right.

He headed back to Mikasa's room to talk to her. He needed to just talk to her and nothing else. This was something important and he needed to know why she acted like that.

He came back to her room and didn't even bother to knock.

He walked in and she was sitting in her bed with her hands playing with the edge of her blanket. He closed the door behind him as he entered the room, making sure to stand a few feet away from her.

She wasn't looking at him, her eyes were looking at her hands.

"Don't get shy on me now" he asked sarcastically and she looked up at him for a quick second.

The silence stretched on and he sighed audibly.

"Just tell me what the hell that was" he growled at her. She didn't look at him again, only shrugged her shoulders. He felt maybe that his emotional state wasn't composed enough to deal with her but as he was contemplating on leaving Mikasa got off the bed and walked over toward him.

He held still as she stood directly in front of him. He looked up at her and kept his face completely blank even though his heart was hammering in his chest.

"Why didn't you stop me?" she asked him quietly. He made sure to keep his eyes trained on her but he was at a loss of words, did he tell her how he felt or did he tell her he was just horny and she was just there.

This could be his chance to make sure whatever the hell this was didn't go any further and now with the coming mission he felt that this was more important to do now than ever, especially since his life was in real danger.

But if he did survive would she find out about his disgusting past, about the real Levi. Levi Ackerman.

He closed his eyes and inhaled the scent of her room, she had only been there a little while and already the small stuffy room had her smell all around it. He couldn't lie to her and he couldn't tell her he was just using her for sex.

"Do you trust me?" he asked in a low voice.

"Yes" she answered without skipping a beat. He opened his eyes in shock that she seemed so adamant about that answer.

"Do you trust me with Eren's life?" he questioned her more seriously. She seemed a little hesitant then and he was about give a sarcastic reply but she cut him off.

"Yes, I do" she said quickly. He eyed her curiously since she didn't seem so confident in her choice. He stepped a little closer to her where their chests were almost touching.

"What if I told you that trust would be tested soon?" he pressed further. She looked like she was getting more and more nervous about answering him, her lips now in a thin line and she seemed to be clenching her fist nervously.

"Can I ask what you mean?" she wanted to know. He didn't want to tell her the exact details of the plan but he decided to listen to Hanji and trust her with some information.

"The next mission will require Eren to be "handed over" so to speak, so he will be placed in a dangerous situation with only me to protect him and we will be up against someone very skilled." He clarified.

"So therefore, do you really trust me?" he asked again now that she knew the gist of the next plan involving Eren. She looked him over and chewed on her bottom lip seeming to mull over her answer. He figured he hadn't earned her trust yet, and he didn't want to force her into anything but he shouldn't have told her so much of the plan.

He felt her grab his hand and his eyes widen in surprise. She leaned down and he couldn't move as her lips pressed softly against his own. The kiss she gave him was soft, her mouth brushing over his and it sent waves of desire flooding deep below.

"I trust you, Levi" she whispered pulling away from his mouth just a tiny fraction. He pulled away a little more so he could concentrate. He came here to talk to her but it seemed to be headed toward a direction that didn't require much talking.

"Now that's out of the way I need an answer to what happened earlier." he reminded her. He needed to know her feelings, what did she feel for him. She seemed to return to her shy and quiet state as he reminded her of his original question when he first arrived.

She looked away from his face and he detected a small flush on her cheeks, she reached for her neck and when she realized it was bare she awkwardly dropped her hand.

"There's no running from this" he warned her and stepped closer to her. Her face grew pinker and her eyes looked around nervously. He couldn't help but think that the way she was acting was a little cute.

"I don't…know" She finally confessed, looking down at her feet.

He sighed and ran his long fingers through his hair, he couldn't really force her to tell him anything since he didn't understand why he felt the way he did either but he was old enough to know the difference between lust and…other feelings.

"You're too young for this anyways" he sighed. She looked up at him abruptly, looking a little upset.

"What does that mean?" she asked coldly. He raised an eyebrow at her sudden display of emotion.

"It means that this is inappropriate on so many levels." He continued. Her chest puffed out and her eyebrows furrowed in an adorable manner. Most people should be afraid of making Mikasa Ackerman mad but Levi was not most people.

"That didn't stop you from trying to take off my shirt" she countered. Levi was taken aback by her abrasive words but he was a little impressed at the same time.

"If I recall correctly you're the one who actually took off my shirt" he retorted crossing his arms over his chest. She quietly snorted at him and crossed her own arms.

"Well, you were sneaking around my room while I was asleep, isn't that a little creepy shorty?" She asked him sarcastically. He felt some embarrassment at the memory of watching her sleep but he kept his poker face.

"I saw your lamp on and came in here to turn it off, nothing more" he lied with a straight face. She pursed her pink lips and he swore he could still feel the way they tasted on his tongue. It felt like the room suddenly went up by a few degrees and all of a sudden her stance looked more predatory than defensive.

"I didn't know the gas switch was on my neck" she pronounced the last word slowly and he felt irritation flow through him, this girl really knew how to push his buttons. He backed up and felt his boot hit the wooden door to her room. He was trapped between the door and the woman he was unreasonably attracted to.

"The point, Mikasa, is that you are my subordinate plus you are too young and naïve for this kind of relationship." He reasoned. She looked almost insulted at his words and he found it a little amusing but none the less his words were true to him.

"Besides I'm not the kind of man you need" he said softly, this made her expression fall and she quirked her head to the side.

"I think you're a good man, a little crude…but still good" she argued with him, her eyes looking down at him innocently. This girl seemed to surprise him constantly and her words sent a pang of warmth into his heart.

"You don't know my past so you can't say that for sure" he argued back. She grabbed his hand and brought it up to her chest, holding it gingerly against her

"Then tell me" she asked of him. His breathing became uneven as she placed his hand on her chest, he could feel the beat of her heart against his hand. It was beating fast, betraying her almost serene expression. He felt a sudden urge to press his ear up to her chest and listen to it.

"Please?" she whispered as she leaned her head down to press her lips against his neck. He felt himself grow ridged almost instantly, his mouth going dry. She seemed to figure out his weak spot so easily, she was a very dangerous woman.

Her lips ascended up his neck and he felt her tongue leave wet hot trails along the taunt skin.

"You're such a brat" he hissed between clenched teeth. Her tongued travelled up his jawline and he felt her hot breath in his ear.

He used the hand that was on her chest to push her away gently.

"How do you expect me to say shit when your tongue is doing that?" he groaned. Her face cheeks were tingled with pink and her eyes looked a little glassy but she gave him a small smile.

"Sorry" she apologized insincerely. He took a calming breath and grabbed her hands.

"My past is ugly, I wasn't the same person as I am now but I…I…damn it I'm not good with this shit…" he trailed off trying to think how to word his feelings without sounding stupid. She looked at him calmly and wasn't rushing him but her eyes were a little wider than usual.

"I have these…feelings and they won't seem to go away but I shouldn't have them because…are you laughing at me?" he accused as he watched her eyes widen more and she covered her mouth with her hand trying to muffle a small sound. He felt a little angry that she would laugh at time like this.

"No! I mean, not_ at_ you. It's just this is very unexpected and a little strange coming from you" She explained grabbing his wrists to keep him in front of her. He was still upset but he figured this was an unexpected turn of events.

"Am I not supposed to have emotions?" he prompted from the girl. She shook her head and looked at him seriously.

"It's not that, it's that up until just a few days ago you seemed so distant and then the thing with the strawberries and what happened earlier…" she didn't finish her sentence but he understood what she meant, they were two people who could hide their feelings very well.

At the mere mention of what happened earlier he felt the air get hotter and suddenly her grip on his wrists loosened, the palm of her hands slowly ascending up his forearms that were exposed by his rolled up sleeves.

Her gaze descended from his eyes to his lips, her own parting slightly. He could read the signs clearly. She wanted him and he wanted her.

"I can't resist you so I'm here for as long as you want me but you can do much better." He advised but his words didn't seem to deter her from whatever she was thinking. Her tongue swept over her bottom lip and he wanted to taste it for himself.

His hands wrapped around her waist and he kissed her passionately. He nipped at her bottom lip and she gasped against his mouth. His strong arms held her close to him. He switched their positions quickly so that she was up against her door and his hands slid down to grip her ass. She wrapped one of her toned legs around his waist. They continued to kiss roughly as one of her hands went to undo the buckle of his pants.

"Eager?" he mumbled against her mouth and she bit down on his bottom lip sharply.

"Ow, brat" he hissed. He felt her hands in his pants and he almost groaned aloud as he felt her cool palm on his erection. She freed him from the confines of his pants and her long flingers encircled his width slowly, he didn't know how much experience she had previously but she showed no signs of uneasiness. His eyes closed at the sensation.

Her hand slid up from his base to his tip mind numbingly slow and she thumbed the slit of his dick where pre-cum was starting to bead.

His breathing was very shallow and labored, his heart beating erratically. He could only focus on what her hands were doing and he realized he had stopped kissing her, their mouths were simply touching one another's.

His one hand gripped her ass hard and the other was now supporting his weight on the door. She moved her thumb around slowly and then gripped him tightly. He swallowed thickly as her hand pumped him up and down once, experimentally. He wanted to stop her so he could focus on touching her but her hand was making it impossible.

She continued to work him and he could only stand there and let her, he was completely at her mercy. She could get him to do anything she wished and he felt that she was more dangerous to him than any other person he had ever encountered.

With every stroke of her palm he felt intense pleasure building in his core, and his hips began to buck involuntarily.

"Fuck" he breathed. He wouldn't be able to last very long at this rate and that thought alone was embarrassing.

He was confused at whether or not she was experienced with this because as he opened his eyes to look at her, her face was covered with an intense red blush. He remembered every encounter they had recently she always blushed deeply. He grasped her wrist to stop her with the last ounce of willpower he had in him.

"Have you ever done anything like this before?" he panted. She looked down and shook her head. His eyes widened in surprise. She really did seem somewhat experienced but she was good at everything. He groaned with the thought of what he had to do next.

He tugged on her wrist until she let him go, he brought her hand up to his mouth and kissed the pads of each finger and then finally her wrist.

"Then I don't want to do it like this" he murmured to her gently. She looked surprised as he tucked his dick back into his pants and then lifted her up to carry her to the bed.

As he turned around he saw the window by her bed.

"Are you fucking kidding me!?" he exclaimed. She turned her head around and saw that the sun was peaking up and sunlight was beginning to trickle into her room.

They had stayed up all night and soon everyone would be getting up to start breakfast.

"Fucking hell" he fumed. This would have to wait. There was no time to do this properly and he didn't want to rush it but would they have time in the next 48 hours until the Reeves Company arrive is the better question.

"I guess this means you have to leave" she commented absently. She was still staring dejectedly out the window.

He sighed and placed her gently on the bed and stood up to fix his clothes and pat his hair back into place. This was just their luck, it seemed they were fated to never finish what they've started. She looked just as disappointed as he did.

"I'll see you at breakfast" he assured her and then gave her a soft kiss goodbye.

"Get an hour or two of sleep in if you can, I won't bother you" he called across his shoulder as he left her room. It was almost painful to leave but he would survive.


End file.
